Having a baby is hard work?
Everyone says this before you have a baby, but anything new is something new to learn so of course its hard work, but its much more rewarding than filing papers at work or making the toilet sparkling clean.
I think in someways we were lucky moving to another country away from everyone before we fell pregnant so there was no ‘normal’ routine in our lives. After having a baby if you try and maintain the norm I think that’s when it becomes overwhelming.
I read this quote the other day which I think reflects being a mum for the first time:
“The moment a child is born, the mother is also born. She never existed before. The woman existed, but the mother, never. A mother is something absolutely new.” – Bhagwan Shree Rajneesh
From what for the first couple of months taught me – you need to let go of the pre exisiting life to learn about how to be a mum for the first couple of months and then bring back the norm slowly – dont get me wrong you’d go insane if you didnt have some ‘you’ time every now and then – get someone over to baby sit so you can watch a movie and try and tune out from the thoughts of mother hood – long showers and baths help aswell.
I had massive post baby brain and I purchased an App for my Iphone called Babylog – it defintally helped me remember the last time he pooed/how much he was drinking/if any routines in his sleep were coming apparent, and then they have a growth spurt and everything goes out the window! – heres a snap shot of a week when he had a growth spurt (blue is when he was sleeping)
As everyone says the first 3 months are the hardest, maybe I was one of the lucky ones but I found it quite easy as all they tend to do is eat poop and sleep, I think its just your mind set and the changes in your life which are different/the hardest to get used to.
I was also very lucky to have an amazing group of ladies to talk to online that all had their babies the same time I did.. so if I though something wasn’t quite right, I could ask them and see if it was happening to anyone else at the same stage – sometimes our own mothers forget how it was/forget when things happened and it can really stress you out if they make you believe something isnt right, when really its the norm for the stage, so I highly suggest either signing up to a online group to help you stay sane, tagging along to the ‘mothers groups’ that your hospital sets up(you might like one of the mothers but its worth it for the support), or even better get your bestie to have a baby at the same time as you!